Jessica Hope's Birth Story

As I remember back about 25 years, I recall the words from Ronnie, Jessica's father, calling her birth a "feminist bonfire." This statement was made after 5 women descended on our house in the anticipation of the joyous arrival of our daughter, Jessica. She was truly a princess, arriving with lots of fanfare. The snow was falling on that November day in Lake Tahoe. Ronnie and James spent much the day of her labor constructing a beautiful snow and ice castle, while I was being attended to by my ladies.

The UPS guy was quite surprised to have a laboring woman answer the door. He was delivering the 3 peony bushes I ordered to plant with her placenta. The peony bush that had the placenta planted beneath it gave us the most beautiful flower our last summer in Tahoe.

I received massage with Jessica in preparation for conception, as well as throughout the pregnancy, labor and postpartum periods. Her pregnancy was during an emotionally difficult time, the pressures of a young family, especially financial concerns were great as we prepared to add another member to our family. In the last trimester we moved from a small one-bedroom rental apartment in Stateline, NV to a three- bedroom rental house across the street from my midwife and good friend, Kate in Tahoe Paradise.

The massages I received throughout Jessica's pregnancy helped me thorough those difficult times. It was also the massages I gave to others that served to heal me. At the time I was massaging a lot of the pregnant women in my community. Kate and I had become dear friends and she insisted that all her clients receive massages from me during their pregnancy. Kate said that this would prepare them in the best possible way to enter labor in a relaxed state. Kate knew this from a personal standpoint, she too was pregnant. We were both blessed to be able to trade massage and midwifery services throughout our coinciding pregnancies. I often joke that Jessica did not cost as much as my other children, but in the end it all seemed to level out.

Kate gave me a lot of important feedback while she was receiving massages from me. The techniques I use today in Nurturing the Mother® pregnancy massage were fine-tuned and developed through the massages I gave during this time.

We also bonded through a pregnancy aquatic exercise class we attended. I often tell my clients if you can get in water to exercise it is one of the best ways to prepare along with prenatal yoga and walking. Kate and I did all three activates to prepare to birth our babies. In fact, Kate actually went into labor after one of our prenatal aquatic classes. Total labor time for the birth of her son, Jacob's, was 4 hours. Kate taught me much about midwifery and the deep spiritual journey. I credit much of the foundations of Nurturing the Mother® and the passion I have with the women I touch to the time I spent learning from Kate.

It was during Kate's pregnancy with Jacob that she introduced me to Jeannine Parvati. We attended her "Birth as a Vision Quest" workshop in the Nevada desert in a Yurt. I had James with me at the workshop, now 3 years old, close in age to Kate's son Zac, which made them perfect playmates. This workshop transformed the view I had of pregnancy, birth, and motherhood. It became obvious that pregnancy is a deep, powerful time to share a sacred journey with your child and family. I was a student of Jeannie's from 1984 until 2005, when she passed away. I still feel her presence from time to time as I pass on the wisdom of mothering that I learned as an eager student sitting by her feet.

Often women friends are pregnant together, my dearest friends, Diane and Hope were also pregnant. Our births were staggered over the course of the year. Jacob was born in August to Kate, Jessica in November to me, Ryan in February to Hope, and Heather in April to Diane. It was a sacred circle of sisters and mothers, daughters and sons. We were all growing up together, and evolving as mothers. As I prepared for Jessica's birth I took the last week before my due date to slow down and read a book. It was a luxury. The Mists of Avalon was my refuge. It is the King Arthur story from the woman's perspective.

It gave me a quiet and sensual place to escape to, a place that lives in all women.

Diane massaged me the most through the end of my pregnancy and into my labor with Jessica. She was trained in Jin Shin Do, and would often add the opening of the energetic meridians from this technique into her bodywork.

Jessica's labor began on that snowy day in November. Kate was in attendance, as were her two sons Jacob and Zac. Kate's husband Michael, a chiropractor was also there, as he was an integral part of my pregnancy, giving me routine adjustments.

After a wonderful breakfast of blueberry pancakes, Jessica's labor began to progress. Before the women arrived, Ronnie exploded as his fear for my, and Jessica's safety surfaced. He was worried that the birth would cause harm to either the baby or me. On the contrary, I had complete faith that this was exactly how I should birth, as I was empowered by the trust in my own body to do the job. After Ronnie was able to reconcile his emotions, he occupied his mind by playing outside with James.

The women started to arrive and prepare. They suggested I take a walk; telling me it would open me up to move. As the snow came falling down, I walked several loops around the neighborhood and with every contraction, I sought the support of my friends and squatted. During one contraction I went into a deep squat and tore the seam of my pants from front to back. The normally embarrassing incident turned out to be a refreshing and humorous as a rush of cool air alleviated the intense heat. After a good laugh we decided it was a good idea to return back to the house.

After returning home, I continued to squat frequently during my contractions and used the wall for back support. Additionally Diane stimulated my uterus reflex point to the extent it felt tender the following day.

After a simple lunch of miso soup I took a nap with James. I woke up around 3 pm to a strong kick and a hard contraction. I walked, moaned, squatted, and cried. Another dear friend, Linde, came over with flowers in her hands to show her love and support. In between howling with the intensifying contractions I thanked her. She did not stay long, things were moving quickly. I was entering the place all women go to if allowed, a space somewhere between intense nearly unbearable pain and bliss meet.

Now on the bed, Ronnie was supporting me by my head. Jessica was beginning to emerge, as Ronnie found himself in a frequent head lock position. I was still howling with each contraction as our daughter moved out of me. James was watching along with Zac, who gave a moment by moment, playback as if he were announcing a sporting event and not a birth. Michael was holding Jacob as I birthed my own little one into my hands.

The clearest memory of this day still marks me 25 years later is when I told Kate, "I'm not pushing, she is."

Ronnie was not ready to catch her, his fear was still too strong. I told Kate that I wanted to catch her. Kate responded with , "Claire, your baby is reaching for you." Her head and torso were already out of me as she extended her arms upwards towards me. Diane took the picture; Jessica and I are reaching for each other.

Astrology is a part of my life even so I respect that is not always followed in other belief systems. I include it in my stories because I see it as the profound timing of pivotal events in one's life. Jessica emerged into my hands at exactly 17 degrees Gemini rising, the exact opposite of my 17 degrees Sagittarius rising. The rising sign changes one degree every 4 minutes.

Jessica came out and onto my belly. Kate allowed the cord to finish pulsating, pushing out the last surge of blood flow and life energy. When all had calmed she had Ronnie and James cut the cord with an obsidian stone that she had found in Yosemite.

Jessica Hope was born into bliss. The birth was followed by the enjoyment of food and friends, who shared details of the event in specifics that I myself, having just experienced it, could not have recalled. I was voraciously hungry and so was Jessica, she nursed like a champ from day 1 to age 2.

The first night I slept out by the wood burning stove, I woke several times throughout the night with powerful after birth pains. The after pains were intense, more so than following my son's birth. Every time Jessica nursed I would have contractions more sharp and painful than those during labor. Before my next child was born, Danielle, I made it a quest to find out how to handle the "after birth" in a more gentle and healing way. Thankfully I accomplished this. Generally, the after birth pains increase with each successive pregnancy, however, I was lucky enough to acquire information and techniques that greatly reduced the pain (This information will be in Danielle's story).

Jessica Hope, whom I had pre-baby conversations with, who I consciously conceived in Hope Valley, who I delivered into my own hands, to this day is a great joy and teacher in my life. Her love of adventure took her to Brazil where she has made her home with her partner Mauricio. She is currently an entrepreneur designing and exporting Brazilian jewelry.